Friday, 27 May 2016

A Blatant Lie

Sorry to all my followers but this needs to be said in my words…

I am deeply saddened and incredibly hurt that I am being accused of refusing to give my Mum a lift to the hospital to visit my dying uncle. This is A BLATANT LIE. From this lie, I have suffered vile abuse and now been excluded from my Dad's 70th birthday celebrations. I am truly heartbroken.

I am putting this on my social media sites to offer people the TRUTH – especially those who have been sucked into this lie. I have practically locked myself away to avoid confrontation and abuse, just because of a lie. I have to protect my children and I can't do that if I am ill through stress. Sadly, they seem hell bent on continuing to cause trouble. So let me be clear. I NEVER refused to help; I NEVER refused a lift. NEVER! 

Stop the lies and move on with your lives. You can be as outraged as you like for this post but you will not stop me speaking the truth and you will never take away our future happiness.

Much love
Pam

Tuesday, 24 May 2016

Party? ...What party?



Unfortunately, people still want to play pathetic games. I say…LET THEM. Let's face it, bullying only exists if one party stays silent. That is NOT going to happen anymore.

Next week is my 48th birthday. I don't care how old I am because I am the happiest I have ever been in my life. Why? Because I was right all along and I promise you, in time, I will write a book trying to explain it all to you. For now, all you need to know is - the demons are out, chased and extinguished. This means, my birthday next week will be the best ever, celebrated with the most important people in my life. Bring on the party

I cannot believe how quickly the school holidays have come around again. They do say, 'time flies when you're having fun.' I love the school holidays, the early mornings, no school runs and the noise and laughter in the house.

So far this week I have been really busy doing lots of jobs on my 'To Do' list. The author profile is complete and will be on my website shortly. This will, hopefully, provide information for prospective agents, publishers and production companies. I've been working on a comprehensive list of agents, publishers and production companies with up to date submission details. I need to be prepared for September so I can work on both my PhD and my writing. I know I can do both – organisation is the key and lots of coffee!

Beyond the Past




Have you had the chance to read it yet? Would you like to review it for me?
Read the first three chapters FREE on my website
Available from:
Pegasus Publishers
Amazon UK
Kindle
Amazon US
Or you can order from your local bookshop. The ISBN number is : 978-1-84386-789-0

Beyond the Lies



















Streetwise


This week I revisited the synopsis or treatment. I am incredibly proud of all my work but this project is particularly special. It raises the issues of homelessness and austerity; but for the grace of God.









PhD


I've spent all week wading through research council papers. Remits are submitted and it's a go!

This week marks a month long period of 'A' level exams. It's so important to create the right home environment during examination time. So far my formula of good breakfasts, chilled atmosphere and lots of love and encouragement seems to have worked. A month to go then a wait until the 18th August for the results. I am confident Wes will give his best as he does in everything he takes on and he will be on the course of his choice come September.
We have so much to look forward to…

Much love


Saturday, 21 May 2016

Because of Meniere's…




I have spent the last ten years of my life fighting the disease, the system, the differing opinions of GPs, some overruling Consultants' opinions then vice versa – on top of trying to raise two boys single-handedly. Some of it is raw, some of it a blur and some of it downright painful.

I was on my knees with no one to turn to and no support. People really did not understand what I was going through and I include the GPs in that category too. My luck changed when I visited my GP surgery and saw a locum whose Mum had Meniere's. She referred me to a Specialist. It only took me three years to get a diagnosis! Once I was diagnosed, I knew life would be challenging and that I would have to adapt to cope with the change.

This diagram accurately reflects the stages I have been through.



Prior to Meniere's, I earned £30,000 a year and had a company car and expenses including private medical and pensions. I loved my job especially the clients I had. I would not have given it up but when it was taken away from me, I was truly devastated. Not only was I ill and didn't know why, I had lost our only source of income. I felt a complete, total and utter failure. It was one of the lowest points in my life. I felt worthless and on the scrap heap, before I had reached 40!

Once diagnosed, the repairs began – emotionally, mentally, if not physically. Don't get me wrong, there have been very dark days and I dare say there will be in the future. It is a living hell but I am more prepared now to cope with the dizziness, the tinnitus, the fullness feeling and the temporary hearing loss. There is no cure. Ultimately though, I have no choice but to adapt. The most amazing part of all this is, I wouldn't be the person I am today, without Meniere's.

Because of Meniere's I have


  1. Been at home to influence and help the boys grow up into fine young men.
  2. Gone to University and achieved a 1st class Honours degree.
  3. Written and published my first novel – Beyond the Past
  4. Written the screenplay, Streetwise
  5. Written the sequel to Beyond the Past – Beyond the Lies and be part way through the Nanny.
  6. Been able to support Wes on his rugby league journey
  7. Realised just how strong and resourceful I am.
  8. Applied and been accepted to study for a PhD – Doctor of Philosophy Computing and Creative Technologies. Me?

PhD


This is a project idea I have been working on, in the background, for a number of years now, since I achieved my Undergraduate degree. 

When Wes was studying GCSE ICT, I was shocked he hated it. It is not a subject any teenager, who has a keen interest in technology and helped to html code at home, should find boring. I did some investigating. I discovered, ICT for him meant replicating a magazine in Abode fireworks. It was basically copying, pasting and adding limited special effects. Trust me, I was bored to tears.

The UK Government introduced new computing curricula into High schools but it is delivered, on the whole, using conventional methods of teaching and, in some cases, by teachers who are not qualified or trained in the subject. I got to thinking – dangerous I know! What if the subject was delivered using Cloud Computing – interlinking experts from all fields within the subject? What impact would it have on the teachers and pupils? What impact would it have on improving engagement, innovation and employability? How would the delivery impact on children from low income families and would it attract more, including more girls, to take the subject and improve the staff shortages in the industry.

I was really nervous submitting it to the University and naturally delighted when I received an unconditional offer. I want to help to create a better future for ALL young people and this will be part of my contribution. I am looking for sponsorship but, for now, I relish in knowing my peers have faith in me to deliver this research. I won't stop writing fiction but, for the next four years, this will be a hobby again.

I am nothing special but life is. I am just a Mum determined to show the boys and the world, I will not let Meniere's or labels define me. Life is AMAZING. Don't let obstacles, including people's ignorance, stop you from realising YOUR dreams.





Tuesday, 17 May 2016

Sometimes…



...you have to accept, you could save a million puppies from drowning and still people will hate you. Sometimes, you write something that people misinterpret because of their inner anger and jealousy. Sometimes, it's not about you at all but you're in the firing line. There is absolutely NOTHING you can do about it. Right?

Wrong…you can do something about it. You can give in and wither away, drowning in abuse and bile, OR you can accept, it is confirmation of your gut instinct and use it as a platform to move on and concentrate on the important things in YOUR life. I choose the latter. I choose to continue to focus on my new career and making a better life for my children. I may have set backs but I won't give up. I may be derailed but I will get back on the right tracks.

Today I feel buoyant and happy, satisfied I am on the right track. It was never going to be easy – times are tough for all of us but I have faith in myself and my children have faith in me.

This week is all about tying up loose ends and research. Projects include:


  • Compiling TV production/ agent information
  • Looking at writing grants
  • Chasing my PhD
  • Completing my author profile
  • Updating my website
  • Synopsis and Treatments
  • General Housekeeping and accounts.
  • looking for part time work - earn some money.


And…there is a small matter of a HUGE football match on Wednesday evening. I want to wish my beloved Liverpool FC a massive good luck from us all here. We'll be watching – YNWA #JFT96. I have a feeling it is our year.

Next week, I can focus solely on my new project and being a Mum to fabulous, well- mannered boys.

Stay safe and focus on your own dreams.